Never Say Never

I am back to the lowest point of my life. A phase I have once promised myself I will never ever go through again. I guess 'Never Say Never' was created for a fucked up moment like this...

The more I try to fix this mess, the more I feel like I'm trying too hard.

'Let it go'
'It's not worth the pain...it never was, it never will be', the heart says.

Maybe I'm just not willing to, as it would alter everything...
Everything that I have been wanting to have...

I held out my hands and I feel like a beggar...
Just exactly how I felt a very long time ago...and promised myself never to go through this torment again, but

Guess what?

NEVER SAY NEVER!

Figure Of Speech

And she said, "You're a very nice girl."

All I wondered and still do, is WHAT made her say that and WHY??

Apart from the blood taking procedure, we barely know each other at all.

You're very nice

• Is it something so random to be said?
• Could it really be so meaningless?
• Or could it be all the meaning you need?

Sometimes, it takes a stranger to guide you to self discovery

Blame It On The Red Wine Or So They Say

Happy New Year 2013!!!

This is all I have got to say :

My dearest Thylage, you have been and you will always be the best of  everything that has happened to me. And NO, this is not the red wine talking. Thank you for always having my back. And yes, I can still remember your explanation that you gave by referring to your bed sheet. Surprisingly, it really did made sense. I know I make things so complicated at times. But I'm so damn glad that you are always, I repeat, ALWAYS, there to make it simpler. You are indeed the best! Sayang u! Muakz!


Dearest Tuan Hamba, you make me happy. Thank you. For more happy times together *cheers*

Dearest Jay, we had (and I bet we will have more of ) the whole year having all the alcohol we want. It's funny how things turned out to be. Even if we don't have much things to talk about, just remember that you are very close to my heart. I'm always grateful that you have never been the typical Indian brother towards me. Sayang u.


Dearest obsession Eva, you indeed have been the best new year (self) - gift I've ever gotten myself. You been cruising me all around for 4 years now. Thank you and Happy Birthday.

Dearest all my FRIENDS at work, thank you guys for being so wonderful. You guys have been the main reason I look forward to coming to work though I hate my job. You guys make my day. DAILY! :) *Very free Ahh you???* Lol!


What else can I ask to have for this brand new year??? I've got them all. Thank you very much.


Much LOVE,
~Hemz~

A Different Title Perhaps?

Poda Podi - Such a turn-off title for a Tamil movie. Especially when the lead actor (Simbu) is known for some lousy acts. Indeed! Alright fine. He's not totally lousy but sometimes he is, to a certain extent. But i will not deny the fact that he have done a number of good movies, directed and acted by himself. So, that was the only reason I checked out the movie, thinking it could be different. And YES, it was NOT disappointing at all. The movie was really good. Except for some of the post marital issues that was potrayed. Will get there in a bit. That's the whole damn point of this blog post anyway.

I have to ask this : Why does almost all INDIAN men (or maybe every man) wants to take control of the woman they marry???

A very simple example : Almost all the lead actresses whom are married to lead actors have stopped acting. But the husband continues acting, fondling other women, being in intimate scenes for movies. Why?? Do they feel insecure about the woman succeeding in the industry or are they feeling insecure of their status?? Enlighten me!

Indian men especially, would always want to be in charge of every damn thing about their wife. They will try their very best to cut off the woman's passion or interest. I know of someone who was so passionate about Indian classical dance - Bharatanatyam, whom after marriage, was totally denied of pursuing her dance. And being a typical woman or shall I say typical Indian woman that she was, she obeyed the husband and gave up on her dance. What a waste!!! Why didn't she fight for herself? I wonder. :S

I still have no clue in what marriage actually means to certain men. Well, most men take their wife as 
a servant slave. They practically expect the wife to serve them for the rest of their life. Even if the wife is a working woman. They expect the wife to do all the cleaning, cooking, baby-sitting, laundry and other chores. Instead of giving the wife a hand, they would actually complain if any of the chores doesn't meet their expectation. They would dirty the house as they please, throw the laundry anywhere about the house and expect them to be cleaned up. Oh yeah, you can question what the hell is a wife for if not for these? Well, a wife is not a fucking servant. That's my point. So, stop treating or expecting them to be one. 

That's for now. I still think the movie would have done way much better if they had a different title. 

If You Don't Have Any, Just Don't Have It

 Image taken from   http://www.shutterstock.com/pic-42314725

Picture this :

3 kids & their mum. Breaking fast. Child#1 goes MIA. Child#2 continues to feast on every possible food that was available. Child#3 decides not to finish her food but demands for more from Child#2's plate. Child#2 refuses to share and Child#3 decides to behave like an uncivilized barbarian throw tantrum. Eventually, moves over to the mother, demanding her food portions, subsequently returning back to Child#2 for his food. The return of Child#1. The battle began. Chaos. The table almost overturned, spilling the drinks - well, you get the idea. The mother is still busy feasting. Child#2, after feasting on all the dishes, drops the big news - Needs to take a dump. Mum too busy stuffing herself with food. A stranger had to help Child#2 with you know what. Child#1 goes MIA again. Eventually returns and start the chaos. Tears & Screams. TOTAL CHAOS!!

THE HIGHLIGHT : I was sitting at the same table with them, totally embarrassed, wishing I would be struck by an electromagnetic shrink ray.

Now, today's topic : PARENTING SKILLS.
*If you think I don't have any rights to talk about parenting just because I don't have a child, SCREW YOU!!*

I grew up in a totally disciplined environment, a so - called military camp. No, it wasn't that bad at all. In fact, the best days of my life is my childhood. So much fun that the kids these days won't know shit about with their electronic gadgets. I grew up in a way where creating havoc/scene, demanding for things and screaming away is a BIG NO or you're in deep shit. So, my siblings and I never did so. Even if we had the thought of behaving so, the stare from my parents is enough to send us an electric shock wave. So, when kids misbehave, I refuse to understand and give in to their barbaric acts. There's a Malay Proverb which says "Melentur buluh biarlah dari rebungnya" (If you don't know the meaning, look it up)

These are the skills that every parent MUST have :

Skill 1 : Stare at your children especially when they misbehave. Nothing is more powerful than a deadly stare.

Skill 2 : When you plan to go on an outing, warn your children on their behavior. Tell them what to do and what not to do. Tell them the consequences if they act barbaric.

Skill 3 : When the child says anything wrong, DO NOT SMILE/LAUGH or anything related to that like as if it's an achievement. Spank Correct him/her right away. Explain on why the action is wrong. If there is a need for an apology, demand for it. The child will definitely understand. Well, at least my siblings and I did.

Skill 4 : When your child sees another child eating and behaves like he/she has been food deprived and creates a drama out of it, the moment you get home, regardless the time,shove give him/her the same food and make sure the child finish it. At the same time, explain to them on why you are doing so.

Skill 5 : Do not let your children run around - be it in a supermarket or a fine dining restaurant. Seriously, people are out for a break and not to see some strays kids running around, acting barbaric.

Skill 6 :To all the MOMMIES, don't pamper your sons to the point of no returns. Don't raise them by indirectly giving them a way to think "women are nature-born slaves". JUST DON'T! In the end, you'll be their slave or they might just not survive the world because women these days NO LONGER put up with that male chauvinist attitude.

Skill 7 : To all the DADDIES, don't spoil your daughters, raising them up like a princess. Simply because you're not living a fairy tale. It's a tough world out there and being a princess is not an acquired skill.

Skill 8 : Mommies & Daddies - the world doesn't evolve around you and your child only. It is equally important to spend time with yourselves. So, allocate the weekend to spend quality time with each other. You have your needs as well. It is NOT NECESSARY to dedicate your whole life for your child and neglect your own relationship. Mommies - after childbirth, please improve your figure. Don't neglect your body and health just because you claim you're so occupied with nursing the child. Bullshit!! If it's not for you, at least it is important to keep your hubby around. If you get my point. ; )  Daddies - Childbirth is really taxing. So, will you just help your wife with at least the simple chores at home or babysitting?? After all, you are one of the contributing factor for the child!!

Skill 9 : DO NOT live your dreams through your child. Do not force your child to pursue a field that you were interested but never get to live in. That's totally selfish.

Skill 10 : Just DON'T take control of your child's life. Give the child the proper freedom at the proper age. You gotta allow them to make the mistakes and learn. You spoon-feed them and they will learn shit on their own. When your child reaches the age of 18, get a grip. DO NOT be in denial and treat the child like a kid. There's nothing more damaging than that.

If you DON'T HAVE ANY of the skills above, just forget about having a child. It's just going to ruin everyone's life, ESPECIALLY yours. Yeah, REALLY IT DOES!