Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Beautifully Broken

*Inspired by "Stray Thoughts" - The Sunday Star*

The article "Broken People" on the newspaper caught my attention. It was indeed a very simple article regarding happiness and pain that got me questioning about my very own self. How many of us are actually being happy to the core? Happy here I meant - REALLY HAPPY-which is being happy without feeling broken or hurt inside-happy without any grudge. Happy of being carefree. Anyone?? If you think you are happy, think again.. Are you REALLY HAPPY about everything??

What is it exactly that makes you feel happy or content perhaps. Is it the amount of cash you have/earn or is it being with your loved ones or is it because of the sense of accomplishment that you feel??

To think of it, happiness is just a temporary phase. Most of the time, we dwell in our "long time ago in a faraway land" issue that had made us feel sad, heartbroken or angry. Just for a thought, have you let go of the fact that you have been hurt by that one person you have loved the most in your life? Do you actually want to let go ? Would you ever let go of it?

We are all actors in the theater of life. A whole lot of us are walking around with so much of grudge and disappointment in within but put up a happy front. Certain acts of people towards us will never fade in time just because we never want to let go of it. Somehow, it is a form of revenge that we seek. When people say time heals, it actually doesn't. It might take forever because we are never willing to let go of even the slightest pain someone caused us.

So, what does it really take for us to be happy to the core?? Is it even possible??

o.O

Yet to find the answer..


Saturday, January 09, 2010

Relationship-An Abusive One

November 21st 2009, 630am - I received a phone call with a loud cry that said, "Hemaa, he's going to kill me!!! He wants me to die!!" and the line got disconnected. 10 minutes later, got a phone call again with the same cry and statement only with additional panting effect and the line got disconnected. I tried calling back for god knows how many times but couldn't get through. Imagine this : 630am, you're getting ready for work and you got THIS phone call from a dear friend of yours that lives about hundreds of kilometer away from you. What would you do ?? Well, I was dumb-strucked!! The failure to reach her again just added spice to that. Eventually, after a few hours, I managed to get her on the phone and I was so relieved to hear that she had managed to escape herself from death. What actually happened??

Her (ex)boyfriend which she used to live with tried to kill her by forcing her to jump into the sea just because she had left him and his other fling is leaving him as well. Not forgetting the part where she was beaten and kicked (which was the main reason why she left him) and even given just ten minutes to make her last call to whomever she wants for the very last time (in which she actually called ME). Somehow she managed to escape and made a police report which there was no action taken.

According to a survey, every 1 in 3 female is involved in an abusive relationship, be it physically, mentally or sexually. Some face death threats and some even got killed by their possessive psychopath boyfriends/husband!! In other cases, some even killed their husband/boyfriends out of self- protection. If at all you realize you are involved in any form of abusive relationship, LEAVE the fucker him for GOOD!!! REMEMBER, if he hit you ONCE, he WILL hit you AGAIN!!!! No matter how sorry he feels after hitting you and promised not to repeat it, he WILL!! Just because that's the only way he can channel his anger, frustration, and possessiveness.

You seriously need to get out of the relationship when

  1. He's having flings everywhere
  2. He keeps on calling to check where you're at
  3. He stalks on you
  4. He refrains you from communicating with the outside world - friends, neighbors
  5. He limits your movement
  6. He keeps track of the time and distance from home to the closest departmental store
  7. He starts to use abusive language on you in front of others-his friends,your friends, etc
  8. He hits you - even if its just a SLAP or a SLAM on the wall
Please don't :
  1. Stay in the relationship just because he make it up to you after all the fights
  2. Stay in the relationship just because your kids need a father - They will be so much better off without him
  3. Stay in the relationship just because you have no options on where to run or what to do about your life
It's your life that you have to live with. Don't live in fear! Move out and start anew. Don't be the victim!!

And yes, after all the physical and verbal abuse my friend went through, she is now doing very fine without that fucker boyfriend. Please, leave before it's too late and Let this be a lesson for everyone to learn!!