*This post is dedicated to both of my creators : Ma & Pa*
There's a significant reason on why I came up with this post. Of course, this doesn't justify for any of my actions nor my sibling's.
I (or shall I say We) grew up in a "Military Camp". YES! I've always described my (our) life as that. I (We) grew up following a routine timetable. From after school hours till we hit the sack. It was strictly to be followed or we were to face the consequences. During those days, Pizza Hut was a place for us to dine and 7-Eleven's Slurpee was an after meal treat. BUT, this would only happen if we were to remember Times Table PERFECTLY. Even one mistake would end us up staying home.
Monthly visits to meet the class teacher was crucial. It was scary but we got used to it. They were too involved in our lives that we never misbehaved much. Ma & Pa always said,"Don't think you can run away from any wrong doings. We know what you guys are doing. We have spies." Its funny when I think about it now because at that time, I actually believed them.
As I(we) became adolescents, things took a turn. We were rebels. Or maybe I was. I had this attitude-ego,rudeness,harshness and all the impoliteness in the world towards Ma. I felt that Ma hated my guts and always complains to dad about my attitude. God knows how many times I made Ma cried. I know, I was such a jackass back then.
Form 6 was crappy as hell. I had fun with my awesome friends. They were God to me. Home was hell. Being home just pissed the shit out of me and I took all the chances I can to stay over at my friend's place whenever I can. For ONE reason : So that I could go out till late night.
Eventually I graduated and got a job. Ma & Pa was the reason for my success. They absolutely are. And I got my brains back as well. I learned to respect Ma. I(We) still had curfew despite the fact that we were above 21. Ma & Pa thought it was necessary. We do break the curfew and faced the consequences. As time passed, we started getting home late. Pa apparently knew the reason but NEVER raised a question. I will not deny the guilt I have always had whenever I got home late.
And today, a confession had to be made. It was for the better. It breaks my heart that we disappointed Pa. It breaks me apart to see him act as if nothing had happened when his world has crashed. It tears me apart to be the cause for his pain. I will have to carry this guilt for the rest of my life because I(We) know that Pa will carry this pain for the rest of his life too. I'm sorry Pa. I'm terribly very sorry for the pain I've(We've) caused.
We have never been the type to show our love to each other but I want Ma & Pa to know that I love you guys dearly. Thank you for being the best. Just remember Pa, you have never failed in any way. You're an awesome dad. Ma, you're awesome too. You have done the best you can and all the mistakes came only from us. Any of my apology will never mend the pain that I've(We've) caused. I'm truly sorry for that.
I(We) Love You, Pa.
I(We) Love You, Ma.
