~2013~ |
Now, where and how do I begin our story with?
I can't totally recall on how it was when we first met, besides the fact that you were an intern. The fact that we were schoolmates but never crossed paths is still a mystery to me. But we clicked immediately when we spoke about books. I thought we would lose contact once you were finished with the internship. After all, that's what happened with other trainees. I was totally wrong. Over the years, we have laughed, cried, argued and even gone on mute mode for weeks. Okay, the mute mode was entirely from my side. But nevertheless, we always managed to pick up the pieces along the way.
From never ending eye-rolls to happy days, we stood by each other and faced everything. The distance was never an issue between us. We made time, we put in our effort and made it work. Fine, I've always managed to maintain and keep my space away from you but that was because I needed it. You know how obsessed I am with my space and life overall. Oh well, moving on...
If there is ONE person who would ONLY want THE BEST IN ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING for me, it would be YOU. I can never thank you enough for that. LITERALLY EVERY DAMN THING. So much so that it is a little disturbing but I know you mean well.
I thought I'd recap on some of our adventures and see how we have evolved to where we are now. In fact, I'm sure you would really want to know this. 😜
Krabi
~Krabi, With Love~ |
After putting up with so much bullshit and drama, we managed to get both our asses to Krabi. Ohh the excitement we had! How we waited for the early flight, how we dipped into the pool without even checking in. The whole trip was an eye opener for both of us. I learned on something in depth regarding anxiety and panic attacks. Something that we needed to talk and discuss about but never did. We understood and dealt with it in our own terms somehow and worked on improving it.
Kuching
~Smoking Cold~ |
The trip you needed the most. To move on and fix all that turmoil and despair was our biggest hope in this trip. I'd say it worked because it gave hope in both of us that things will indeed get better and the most important thing we need to work on above everything else is self-love.
Sihan Naatkal
~Our Core Character~ |
We set our bar so high in this trip. Laughed so much that every damn thing was hilarious for us. I doubt any other future trips will be up to this par. This trip brought us closer and made us believe that life hoes on, no matter what. We just gotta live our lives to the fullest, as much as we can. Everything about this trip cracks me up. Every damn time!!
Daily Talks
~Flirting Is An Art~ |
The one and only person to converse using Thalaivar's gif. Regardless of how serious the conversation is, we end up cracking ourselves up with laughter. Sometimes I wonder, how is it that we are able to yap all day, everyday and still not run out of topics to discuss. At times, you try your very best to climb over the walls I've built, trying really hard not to be obvious. But my love, I know. I'm well aware when you do that. Whether it is intentional or not, I know when you are being extra careful with our conversations. I know when you go on some sort of psychoanalysis mode to study everything I say. Don't get me wrong though. I am always looking forward to our deep conversations and thoughts. I don't know that many people whom I can strike up a deep, thought provoking conversation with. It would be one thing that will not change between us. But just remember that I stand firm to 'Some things are better left unknown and not everyone is allowed in every aspect of my life and space, regardless of the intimacy'.
The Dark Side
~Proximity~ |
The past 2 years has been a great experience for the both of us. My relapses of mute mode have been driving you nuts, to the point of no return. I totally understand that you only mean well to help me out but I just needed to deal shit on my own. Besides, I choose not to discuss it with anyone at all. Period. I'm always back in one piece though, even if it takes a little longer. Let's just be grateful for that. I know the whole fiasco of my mute mode kills you inside for not being able to help out but my love, that doesn't make you a lousy ass friend. I just need my space and time. 😉😊
Anytime, All The Time
Since the beginning of days, you have been totally obsessed and possessive towards my well being. How dissaproving you get whenever Kili or EC is mentioned, even if it was just a random thought. Over the years, we've been so clingy towards each other throughout various stages of emotional and mental state. Regardless, I still stand strong to what I've been telling you all these while. I ain't no oxygen. Life hoes on even when I'm not around. You will sail through, putting into thoughts all that we've been through, recalling my eye rolls and my savage, sarcastic replies. But then love, as long as I'm around, this will always be my stand for you : Anytime, All The Time.
I love you. 💝😘
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