ALL OF LIFE AND HUMAN RELATIONS HAVE BECOME SO INCOMPREHENSIBLY COMPLEX THAT WHEN YOU THINK ABOUT IT, IT BECOMES TERRIFYING AND YOUR HEART STANDS STILL.
~Anton Chekhov~
Came across this quote when I was surfing the net. Was randomly searching for funny quotes and I came across this one and decided to blog about it. =)
To think of life, it is so unpredictable. No matter how much you plan your life to be, somehow it turns out the other way round, for good or bad, that's another issue. To accept the changes and to live throughout life is the major issue. It's not easy to adapt to changes and it takes time. Drastic changes may take dinosaur years.
Human relations is just another major issue that we always never seem to get answers. At one moment, we worship a person, the next moment, we completely loathe the very same person. At one moment, we may loathe a person and the next moment we would look up and worship the very same person.
Personally, I would say life is very complex. It's unpredictable. The very same thing that we might have fear to face will just happen to take place the moment we least expect it to happen. Somehow, you have to just face it, bearing all the truth and hurt life brings you. I may be pessimistic here, but what's the point of being optimistic when we don't sweat about all the happiness and cheers life brings us? Do we feel worried when we are happy?? Possibly not.
Life has always scare me from one way to another. I won't say that I've lived long enough to bitch about life but somehow life has taught me to be extremely cautious with people and life itself. At the same time, it has taught me to not to be so paranoid about it. It has taught me to take things slow and learn to breathe. Somehow, I'm living it, from day to day, slowly digesting and trying to move on though it scares me every now and then.
Friday, December 12, 2008
Monday, December 08, 2008
Life's Uncertainty 2
My family and I paid a visit to the Rumah Seri Kenangan, Taiping today. It was a sudden plan made yesterday. It was our first visit there so we basically took about 2 hours to travel from Penang Island to Taiping as we didn't really know the route.
The place basically looked new and clean. The moment we entered, I saw a few Warga Emas sitting on the bench. There was a Mak Cik, sitting under the tree talking to herself and waving at us. She was extremely thin. On a bench, I saw another Warga Emas, holding his walking stick, resting his head on the bench, which to me, looks like he was really very upset and frustrated with his life. I guess it's all about the mindset. Perhaps, because he was there, I feel like he is not having a life he was supposed to have. Maybe if I had seen him elsewhere, I wouldn't even bother. In short, I'll definitely totally ignore his presence or walk off fast, thinking he's a crackhead.
The reason we went there was actually to visit a relative of us, Atta(Grandma in Tamil), aged 82. I know it's not something to be proud of to actually say I went to visit my relative in an old folks home but situation turned out to be so. Once we gave our names and registered, we were allowed to see her. We were brought to one of the house block and then she was called. The landscape was a very good sight. Calm and quiet, with palm trees and reflexology stones, with garden bench and tables almost at all places. There was a corner named "Teraputik Mesra", with canopies and reflexology stones as well.
On the house porch, there were a few Warga Emas talking among themselves. Atta came out after being called a few times. She has gone so much thinner, hunched and she was using the aid of walking stick though she can walk steadily. Her toe was overlapping her big toe on both the feet. She looked very much clean and well looked after. The moment she saw us, she fastened her footsteps and started crying. It was really very devastating to see her cry. Gave her a hug and sat at the canopy. She was telling about the condition there,about how they are taken care of. She even mentioned about who else has visited her the week before. She sound so happy when she talks and she even put a smile on her face like as if there's nothing wrong. But I bet, deep inside she would have been very devastated which at the same time she had already accept the reality that she's there.
Then came another Warga Emas and said to Atta, "You always never tell that someone is here to see you". She sat at the canopy with us and shared her part of the story. She's from Ipoh, was down with stroke and abandoned in Penang GH. Then she was sent here. Only now she's been able to walk. She said she's pretty much happy here because there are people taking care of her, she has friends to talk with, supplies of medication and many more. She was pretty much with a smile on her face all the time. She asked Atta whether she'll be following us back. Atta said yes and asked whether she would follow and she said yes. And Atta said, "But we have to walk. They won't take us by car. Is it okay with you?" I sensed the sarcasm and I know it is very much a blind expectation they have everytime somebody comes to visit them.
From far, I saw a Warga Emas, a partially blind man, walking towards the clinic, right opposite the canopy we were sitting. He came to us and said hi. He told us his part of life. It seems he was from Burmah Road, Penang and was found stranded by the roadside and brought here. The wife, children and in laws abandoned him as they claim he has some mental illness. He mentioned that they abandoned him because he couldn't make money to feed the family but his children are well to do. He said "Now they have money, they abandoned me. They said I'm a mental case. It's okay, God is watching everything. If now they can abandon me, one day they will be in my shoes. I'm not cursing but that's the way of life. I'm just waiting to be with God. I'm happy here, the people treat me well and all but I'm just waiting to be with God. Once I'm dead, the chapter of my life will be closed." I felt such a heartbreak listening to him talking like that. He was being very practical, but I sense the sadness in him.
We left at 12pm as it was already lunch time for Atta. First time in my life, I visited the old folks home and it gave a huge impact on me. I wouldn't blame those who sent their parents to the old folks home nor I wouldn't say it's a good thing to do. It all depends on an individual's life situation. Personally, I think that if at all you had sent your folks to these places, at least pay them a visit. It makes them happy. Of course, they talk about their stories over and over again but your presence makes them happy that you actually do care for them and you didn't mean to abandon them.
Somehow, it just got me asking "Will I send my parents to old folks home??" I will never say NO as I do not know what's going to happen in future but I seriously hope that there won't be such a situation that will cause such devastation to my parents. To those who runs these Warga Emas institutions, I would say they are doing a good job. There might be some weakness and all but at least they are doing their level best to care for these Warga Emas. =)
The place basically looked new and clean. The moment we entered, I saw a few Warga Emas sitting on the bench. There was a Mak Cik, sitting under the tree talking to herself and waving at us. She was extremely thin. On a bench, I saw another Warga Emas, holding his walking stick, resting his head on the bench, which to me, looks like he was really very upset and frustrated with his life. I guess it's all about the mindset. Perhaps, because he was there, I feel like he is not having a life he was supposed to have. Maybe if I had seen him elsewhere, I wouldn't even bother. In short, I'll definitely totally ignore his presence or walk off fast, thinking he's a crackhead.
The reason we went there was actually to visit a relative of us, Atta(Grandma in Tamil), aged 82. I know it's not something to be proud of to actually say I went to visit my relative in an old folks home but situation turned out to be so. Once we gave our names and registered, we were allowed to see her. We were brought to one of the house block and then she was called. The landscape was a very good sight. Calm and quiet, with palm trees and reflexology stones, with garden bench and tables almost at all places. There was a corner named "Teraputik Mesra", with canopies and reflexology stones as well.
On the house porch, there were a few Warga Emas talking among themselves. Atta came out after being called a few times. She has gone so much thinner, hunched and she was using the aid of walking stick though she can walk steadily. Her toe was overlapping her big toe on both the feet. She looked very much clean and well looked after. The moment she saw us, she fastened her footsteps and started crying. It was really very devastating to see her cry. Gave her a hug and sat at the canopy. She was telling about the condition there,about how they are taken care of. She even mentioned about who else has visited her the week before. She sound so happy when she talks and she even put a smile on her face like as if there's nothing wrong. But I bet, deep inside she would have been very devastated which at the same time she had already accept the reality that she's there.
Then came another Warga Emas and said to Atta, "You always never tell that someone is here to see you". She sat at the canopy with us and shared her part of the story. She's from Ipoh, was down with stroke and abandoned in Penang GH. Then she was sent here. Only now she's been able to walk. She said she's pretty much happy here because there are people taking care of her, she has friends to talk with, supplies of medication and many more. She was pretty much with a smile on her face all the time. She asked Atta whether she'll be following us back. Atta said yes and asked whether she would follow and she said yes. And Atta said, "But we have to walk. They won't take us by car. Is it okay with you?" I sensed the sarcasm and I know it is very much a blind expectation they have everytime somebody comes to visit them.
From far, I saw a Warga Emas, a partially blind man, walking towards the clinic, right opposite the canopy we were sitting. He came to us and said hi. He told us his part of life. It seems he was from Burmah Road, Penang and was found stranded by the roadside and brought here. The wife, children and in laws abandoned him as they claim he has some mental illness. He mentioned that they abandoned him because he couldn't make money to feed the family but his children are well to do. He said "Now they have money, they abandoned me. They said I'm a mental case. It's okay, God is watching everything. If now they can abandon me, one day they will be in my shoes. I'm not cursing but that's the way of life. I'm just waiting to be with God. I'm happy here, the people treat me well and all but I'm just waiting to be with God. Once I'm dead, the chapter of my life will be closed." I felt such a heartbreak listening to him talking like that. He was being very practical, but I sense the sadness in him.
We left at 12pm as it was already lunch time for Atta. First time in my life, I visited the old folks home and it gave a huge impact on me. I wouldn't blame those who sent their parents to the old folks home nor I wouldn't say it's a good thing to do. It all depends on an individual's life situation. Personally, I think that if at all you had sent your folks to these places, at least pay them a visit. It makes them happy. Of course, they talk about their stories over and over again but your presence makes them happy that you actually do care for them and you didn't mean to abandon them.
Somehow, it just got me asking "Will I send my parents to old folks home??" I will never say NO as I do not know what's going to happen in future but I seriously hope that there won't be such a situation that will cause such devastation to my parents. To those who runs these Warga Emas institutions, I would say they are doing a good job. There might be some weakness and all but at least they are doing their level best to care for these Warga Emas. =)
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